Unless you’re Italian or trying to sell a
house, you may not be aware that today is Saint Joseph’s Day.
You remember Joseph? Husband of Mary? Taught
Jesus everything he knew about carpentry and joinery?
Yeah, that’s the sad tale. Poor guy is always
losing out: in the Nativity, it’s all the Madonna and the kid; in cursing it’s
always Jesus-Mary-and-Joseph; in March it’s always Saint Patrick.
Joseph is the patron of, among others, the
Church Universal, workers, families, engineers, the dying, Canada,
confectioners, travelers, those in doubt, cabinetmakers,
Korea and Vatican II. Also of house sellers and hunters,
which should make him a pretty busy fellow these days.
Today is his official feast day—celebrated
widely in Italian communities around the world with altars decorated with
flowers, limes, candles, wine, breads, cookies, pastries and other
symbols of the good life. This is of particular importance when you consider
that Saint Joseph’s Day usually falls in Lent, when consumption is constricted.
(There’s another day, 1 May, dedicated to Saint
Joseph the Worker; but that was invented in 1955 by Pope Pius XII to counter
the godless communist/union/laborer May Day holiday, so you can fuggedaboutit.)
What I remember about Saint Joseph’s Day is
that it’s when the swallows come back to Capistrano—that’s the Mission of San
Juan Capistrano, in the eponymous town in Orange County, California. Turns out
that the swallows usually show up a couple of days on one side or another of 19
March, but everyone turns a blind eye to those little
discrepancies and enjoys the hell out of the miracle of the swallows.
There are decades of stories about how Saint
Joe helps the desperate sell their homes: you bury a (plastic/stone/wooden)
statue of the saint (head up/head/down/horizontal) in your (front/back/side)
yard and Bob’s your uncle—the house is sold.
You can buy purpose-made statues for precisely
this use from a variety of sources both on and off line, including
from some realtors.
No clue as to how the saint may help home
buyers, unless there’s some karmic connection that his statue in your yard
attracts exactly the right buyers for this house.
BTW—on this particular Saint Joseph's Day, we're also celebrating former Kleptocrat "economic adviser" Peter Navarro entering prison for ignoring a congressional subpoena WRT the January 6th investigation. SCOTUS yesterday turned down his request to stay pending appeal. Let's hope he's the first of many administration officials involved in the insurrection, going all the way up to the top.
Happy Saint Joseph’s Day to
you, Petey. Make lots of new friends.