I wasn’t going to
comment on the attempted assassination of Cadet Bonespurs in July; I’m not
really big on conspiracy theories. We actually did land on the moon—more than
once, Lee Harvey Oswald shot JFK and the hundreds of children and staff who
have been murdered in mass shootings in the past two decades are not crisis
actors.
But I have questions
about the shooting at Butler, Penn., on 13 July. Well—I have an array of facts
that I cannot seem to align.
When the news came
across social media that someone had shot at the Kleptocrat, I was dismayed.
Like most decent people, I don’t want him dead and martyred; I want him alive
to lose the election, spend months in courts fighting the numerous cases
brought against him and then serve his well-deserved prison time.
I also thought, “Well,
what’s up, Secret Service? This does not seem good.”
But when video,
photos and witness accounts started streaming, my spidey senses tingled. “Staged”
was the word that came to mind, even though that seemed very unlikely, unless
the USSS was in on it—and that seemed even less likely.
So I’m not going
to propose a theory; I’m just going to posit some thoughts both for and against
theatre.
Against:
The Kleptocrat is
a physical and moral coward. I flat out cannot see him agreeing to any stunt
for any purpose that involves someone firing live ammo anywhere in his vicinity.
We’ve seen the video of him dodging an eagle on his desk and fleeing a bird
that got into his rally. The guy dodged the Vietnam draft five times and has
not acquired any courage in the decades since.
I don’t think he’d
even agree to the notion of someone firing blanks because he might remember the
incident on the set of Rust and all the tsuris that brought Alec
Baldwin. We’ve never seen him firing a weapon of any type. He shills for the
NRA, but he’s not comfortable around guns. At all.
For:
(Yes, that’s all I’ve
got against.)
The Kleptocrat is
a coward, as noted above. Were he to believe he was actually being fired on, he
would collapse, fill his diaper and start crying. USSS would have to drag his whimpering
ass off the stage.
Seemed like it
took a while for his USSS detail to get on the stage and haul his ass down
behind the podium. Time is relative, of course, and I am not an expert. But I’ve
seen clips of real assassination attempts on Gerald Ford and Ronald Reagan;
this was different. It was almost as though…they might have thought it wasn’t
urgent?
The alleged wound
Cadet Bonespurs suffered: meh. I get it—if a piece of shattered glass
Teleprompter or even the very edge of the bullet fired by the shooter nicked
his ear, there might not be a big hole, but you’d expect something he'd show off—especially out
of someone like him. There’d be close-up photos, which he would turn into NFTs
and hawk for $99 per.
We have no medical
records or information from the ER doctors who treated him. Yeah—HIPAA; fair enough. But you'd think if the ER report indicated some kind of wound, he'd be waving the papers all over Fox. What they did release was a letter from ex-White House disgraced and demoted physician Ronny “Candy Man” Jackson. He saw
Klepto later in the day and described “a 2 cm wide wound that extended down to the
cartilaginous surface of the ear. There was initially significant bleeding,
followed by marked swelling of the entire upper ear.”
Huh.
Klepto played
golf the next day and a photo of his right ear showed no indication of either a
1.75”-wide wound or marked swelling. However, by the time he showed up at the
Republican National Convention a few days later, his ear was covered by a white
mattress to signal his suffering. Once the convention ended, the mattress came
off and he was back on the golf course.
(Look—I get it:
there were actual bullets being fired at the man. You don’t need to be hit for
it to be an assassination attempt. But if you weren’t hit, why all the
performative nonsense? And if it was performative nonsense, I do not believe he
has the cognitive wherewithal to do this on the fly; he would have had to have
been coached ahead of time.)
Despite all signs
that there was at least one shooter getting off shots, the USSS detail allowed
the Kleptocrat to stand up above their protective huddle, adjust his hair and
stick his fist up in the air to shout, “Fight, fight, fight.” This is
completely counter to protocol—for an example of how it’s supposed to be done,
take a look at the video of how Reagan’s team reacted after he was shot by John
Hinkley. They tackled him and then practically threw him into the limo. No
letting head/chest above their body shields. The performance at Butler was just
bizarre. But the photo was great for the campaign; very “Raising the Flag at Mount
Suribachi”. And now I have to vomit in my mouth.
The Kleptocrat has
been remarkably quiet about that event—he mentioned it at the beginning of his
RNC speech, but then moved quickly on to other grievances and lies. In the past
week, he’d started to bring it up more, as a way to turn conversations away
from his disastrous debate performance against Kamala Harris. But given his
proclivities, I’d have thought that if he had really felt in danger you wouldn’t
be able to shut him up about how everyone’s out to get him. This really does seem
out of character.
Moreover, in
addition to not banging on about it, he’s been remarkably calm about it. Back
in the last century, I worked in an office near LAX that had a parking garage
for employees. One morning one of my office mates came in to recount an armed
man trying to mug people going to their cars the previous evening. “He has a gun,”
someone shouted. Jan and several other people ducked behind parked cars until
the guy jacked someone’s vehicle and crashed through the exit barrier to
escape.
I wasn’t even part
of that incident but for weeks afterward I was jittery. Any normal human can’t
help being visibly affected after being faced with violent crime—just the reality
that it’s part of our world is unsettling. But the Kleptocrat? He screams and
spits for weeks when someone laughs at him; do you really think that if
he believed someone were shooting at him he wouldn’t be freaky as hell?
Neutral:
The rounds fired
in his direction on 13 July were indeed live; one person was killed and two
wounded—actual wounds requiring real treatment. You might think this would be
an argument against the incident being staged, but that would be to ignore the
Kleptocrat’s narcissism. Any collateral damage is okay with him if it serves
his purpose. People hurt, people killed—actually, that helps prop up the narrative
of him as the Chosen One going in harm’s way on behalf of his MAGA. The lives
impacted and ended are immaterial to him. It’s just the cost of doing business,
which—as per usual—someone else pays.
The performance of
USSS and local law enforcement on the ground that day was, uh, suboptimal. I
mean—it was actually like the Keystone Kops. A guy with a long rifle gets into
the audience area, climbs up on a building, is pointed out to security and cops
by many attendees; the building he’s on is actually full of local cops. And…he
still gets off several shots before he is terminated by USSS snipers.
(I wonder if
Bonespurs rethought his demands on 6 January 2021 that his security team remove
the magnetometers that were screening the crowd for weapons. He didn’t like the
fact that it was keeping some people out—“They’re not going to hurt me,”
he whined. “Let them in.” Nah—no rethinking.)
Investigators have
found remarkably little information about the shooter—two months out and there’s
still no report on any motive for the 21-year-old registered Republican. That
latter fact may be one reason why Republicans aren’t foaming at the mouth,
although Senate Rs are planning an investigation to gin up turmoil in the
run-up to the election.
So that’s what I’ve
got: extraordinarily out-of-protocol performance by USSS, no documented sign of
wounding, most likely coached performative reaction, out-of-character silence
about it until recently. Versus him being a complete coward who’s extremely
unlikely to be involved in anything that involves firearms and live ammo.
I dunno.
Yes—we had a
second incident involving a Republican with a military-grade weapon that he
bought legally purportedly attempting to take out the Kleptocrat. This one is
harder to put in the “assassination” box, though.
First of all—saying
it’s unusual for someone to be at a golf club in Florida with a long rifle is
kind of silly. Given that state’s laws and politicians in the bag for the NRA,
it’s not unusual. It’s actually mandatory. If you're going to start taking away White guys' guns before they play golf, the Kleptocrat's going to lose a lot of greens fees; maybe even members.
Second—there was
no press release that TFG would be golfing that day and the perp hung out at
the edge of the course for 12 hours. Now, I get it—it would be a good bet that
on any day when the weather is good, the Kleptocrat would be on the nearest of
his courses, cheating at golf and collecting cart fees from his protective
detail. But we’re not talking KGB assassin material here.
Third—Republicans are
getting shirty about people having guns taking pops at their leader. But not
worried enough to do anything about stopping nutjobs from getting military-grade
weapons and shooting up the landscape. Some things just never change.
Fourth—assuming actual
assassination attempts, Melania’s going to have to consider doing the job
herself if she wants it done.
©2024 Bas Bleu