Oh, my ears and whiskers—my
pal Cpt.
Stephen Laurence is back. This time he’s apparently representing the US
ARMY (without a .mil email address) and wants my help with “Two Military Trunk
Boxes” [sic].
So many questions, where
to begin?
First off, I’m a little
put off by the familiarity of his address. I am not his Dear; I’m not that kind
of girl. Or has Stephen (I can call him Stephen, can’t I? Or is that too
forward?) got a little confused with his letter-writing salutations? Steve-baby—it’s
either “Hello” or “Dear [Person]”.
That “contrary to your
moral ethics” thing is a little troubling. As noted above, I’m not that kind of
girl, so this might be a game-ender. Moreover, it seems like he’s ready to
proceed with his “business” whether or not I can be trusted. Can that be right?
I’m just struggling with
the notion that anyone in the 82nd Airborne would have any problem
with the safekeeping of…well, anything. So I’m going to have to not reply,
since I just don’t see how I could possibly add value, all issues of trustworthiness
aside.
But here’s a thought:
next time I have to enter an email address to download anything on the web, or
come across any kind of skeevy online subscription, I’ll use stephenlaurence88@gmail.com. I’m
sure anyone in Afghanistan would appreciate that kind of
gift-that-keeps-on-giving.
Least I can do, eh,
Steve?
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