Friday, October 30, 2009

Trick or terror?

The Washington Post has asked the masters of human fear (writers specializing in horror and suspense) to name their favorite tales of terror.

I’m not someone who goes out of her way to read horror or the like. And I definitely don’t ever watch the stuff. (My sister once had The Haunting, adapted from Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting of Hill House [a pick by one of the writers], on TV late one night. It scared the liver out of me, but made me too afraid to leave the living room and go through the dark house alone to get to my bedroom, so I had to stay until it was over because she wouldn’t go up with me. The toad.)

Okay, I did go to see Alien. But it was on a date and the guy I was with, a writer/producer manqué (this being Hollywood), had been up the night before working on a script and drinking Bordeaux. As the suspense mounted (and Ridley Scott definitely knows his onions on that count), I realized 1)why I don’t like scary movies (I get really wrapped up in the illusion, become one of the characters and they’re too dumb to come in out of the rain, much less stay away from monsters; so I know they're going to get me killed); and 2)that alien was going to jump off the screen straight at me and this fool was too hungover to provide any assistance.

I told him that later and his response was, "You're right."

However, I digress.

With the above disclaimer, let me just say that the scariest story I’ve ever read was “The Beast with Five Fingers”, by W.F. Harvey (never saw the flick). That sucker kept me awake for a week after I finished it. I don’t think I’ve ever read a horror story since.

So, this being Samhain/All Hallows—what’s your pick for the story that scared the daylights out of you?

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Net flu

Lest you be one of those scoffing at the idea that the H1N1 (swine) flu pandemic is a crock of codswallop, consider this news: the Government Accountability Office (GAO) has issued a report warning that people home sick hitting the electrons could overload our information highway and create the mother of all data traffic jams.

Think 72-car pile-up on I-5 along the Grapevine on the day before Thanksgiving.

According to the GAO, it’s people “sick, working from home” who will log on to the Internet, clogging the networks and bringing things to a halt.

(They don’t seem to factor in the folks who’ll play online poker, watch episodes of Project Runway on Hulu or visit porn sites. My sense is that there’d be a whole lot more of this type of activity than teleconferencing or swapping spreadsheets.)

So what, you say? Well, it seems that overwhelmed networks deny service to things like financial markets, public services and Homeland Security.

Evidently some securities markets have contingency plans in place, but not all. And Homeland Security doesn’t appear to have thought of that scenario, much less devised a plan to deal with it.

Just consider what that’ll do to your access to www.swinefluisahoaxbythetrilateralcommission.com

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Hang 'em high

The walls are closing in on war criminals this week, even if they’re still acting as though they’re the victims and not the perps.

Germany’s last court of appeals has tossed out the pathetic plea of John Demjanjuk that the case should be dropped because of health reasons. Oh, and the 89-year-old really never hurt anyone at Sobibór or Majdanek back in the good old days of Nazi rule. He was actually a victim, don’t you know?

Demjanjuk, who was stripped of his US citizenship and deported to Germany for prosecution earlier this year, will start the trial next month in Munich.

Meanwhile, at the Hague, Radovan Karadzic, the Bosnian Serb architect of genocide of Bosnian Muslims and Croats, has been boycotting his own war crimes trial for the past couple of days. However, presiding judge O-gon Kwon called Karadzic’s bluff Tuesday and ruled that the prosecution can continue with or without the mass-murderer in the dock.

The 64-year-old Karadzic, acting on his own behalf, says he needs WAAY more time to build his defense.

Yeah, because he's guilty, guilty, guilty.

Let me do some gloating that two examples of the worst humanity can vomit up on this earth are being brought to justice—no matter what the time lag between their crimes and their trials. Too many of their ilk have cheated retribution by either dying of old age in their beds, or (like Karadzic’s role model, Slobodan Milosevic) dying of old age in prison awaiting trial. (and Karadzic's trial is expected to last through 2012; that's with an abbreviated case.)

I don’t care how old they are or in what state of health—their crimes should be prosecuted and punished.


Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Enemies of the people

Interesting report from the NY Times about government snooping on British subjects.

Evidently it’s not enough to have CCTV cameras on every street corner tracking the movements of people out & about. Local governments have the right to run “directed surveillance missions” on their citizens—including tailing, tapping phones & going through all sorts of records—for what I can only characterize as the most trivial rumors of infractions.

(& like the US Patriot Act provisions, they can do it without that pesky impediment of jumping through any sort of legal hoops. Like obtaining a warrant.)

& what sorts of high crimes are they investigating, you ask? Why—such felonious pursuits as failing to recycle, putting trash out too early & letting your dogs bark too loud. Apparently all that’s needed to set the wheels a-spinning is some accusation of wrongdoing. & the data collected on the miscreants doesn’t go away even when they’re not found guilty. It goes into some central repository.

Am I the only fan of the tradition of Anglo-American law creeped out by this?

You have to wonder about the use of public resources for this sort of thing. At the very least, I’d like to hear about surveillance on persons suspected of something more than failing to pick up poop after their dogs. Like bombing the London Tube or torturing & murdering young Yorkshire women over the course of several years.

The story doesn’t say what these activities cost the local governments, or what services they have to cut back on in order to mount them. Whatever it is, it can’t possibly deliver value in terms of a safer society that outweighs the financial & civic confidence in elected leaders.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Sweating spirituality

There’s something about the story of three deaths in a faux-Indian sweat lodge ceremony earlier this month in Sedona that grabs me.

It’s a pity about the three people who lost their lives, of course. But what strikes me is this whole phenomenon of adults so in search of…something that they pay money (in large sums) to any fast-talking self-proclaimed spiritual leader who'll put them through an ordeal that, if mandated by some government, say, or an employer, would spark class-action lawsuits.

I guess what surprises me is that there aren’t more deaths resulting from this sort of thing.

In the “spiritual warrior” experience led by James Arthur Ray, “nationally known New Age guru”, 50 people paid $9,695 for the privilege of spending 36 hours without food or water in the Arizona desert on a vision quest and then three hours in the sweat lodge. (For those unfamiliar with the term “sweat lodge”, think unregulated, smoke-filled sauna.)

I don’t know why this wasn’t seen as a recipe for disaster. Fifty people in a space 24 feet wide and 4.5 feet high. Twenty-one people ended up in local hospitals, with three eventually dying. Despite several participants showing signs of serious trouble, Ray, it seems, blocked the exit.

Yavapai County sheriff investigating the incident as a homicide, but so far no one’s been charged.

Ray, whose company made $9.4M last year from speeches, seminars, retreats, books and videos, says he’s cooperating. It’s gotta bite, after all, if you lose paying customers in such close proximity to your “empowering” events.

Now, here’s my issue. What is it with people who scoff at organized religion as institutional superstition but fall slack-jawed in awe at any caftan-wearing self-proclaimed guru with bad teeth and a worse haircut who promises them spiritual enlightenment if they’ll only [insert ceremony here].

I have a friend who falls into that category. About eight years ago she tried to get me to go on a trip to Sedona run by someone who was supposed to be au fait with all types of spiritual practices. I never told her but the prospect of spending ten days in a mini-van/Comfort Inn with 11 middle-aged white women oohing and ahing about Hopi ceremonies and then engaging in replicas of same just gave me the willies. Their mission, and I am not making this up, was to focus cosmic energy on righting 400 years of wrongs done to the Native Americans.

They were conducted around by some local middle-aged white woman who was supposed to be connected to the local tribes, although there were apparently a couple of instances where the women had to stand at quite a distance because the Hopis weren’t wild about interlopers, no matter how sterling their intent.

When she returned, totally enthused about the experience, my friend showed me her photos of the events. There was one of the women seated in a circle on the ground. It was some sort of prayer circle, meant to concentrate their spiritual powers. She said that the picture was taken just before the heavens opened up and poured rain down on them.

“But that’s okay—it was a cleansing rain.”

Apparently the thought that the gods might be pissed off at the effrontery of 12 middle-aged white women from Virginia thinking that they could erase 400 years of policies in ten days at the Comfort Inn and were expressing their displeasure with the downpour never occurred to them.

So many of these spiritual guides make a very, very good living out of their vision quests and seminars and retreats. Maybe not $9.4M, but comfortable. (And I’m not saying that some don’t indeed have some spiritual gifts that they do share with their followers—maybe without even charging.) But when a New Age guru accepts MasterCard or Discover, how is that different from Jim and Tammi Faye?

BTW, for that vision quest, Ray sent his paying guests out into the October desert for 36 hours with only a sleeping bag. Although he offered to sell them Peruvian ponchos for $250.

I rest my case.

However this investigation turns out, I’d like to think that at least one charlatan has been revealed. But even if he is, his acolytes are sure to stick by him.

Or move on to the next one.