This fairly clapped-out Chevy was parked in the
neighborhood:
What caused me to shoot this was wondering how
it is that a model that’s less than 40 years old gets classified as “antique”?
Showing posts with label Gang of Three. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gang of Three. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 6, 2018
Thursday, September 10, 2009
We the suckers...
In case there was any doubt in your mind, a report by the Congressional Oversight Panel has made it official: we-the-people’s involuntary bail-out of GM and Chrysler was basically billions washed down the drain. It’s a “loan” we’ll never see repaid.
You can kiss the initial $23B flung out by the Bush administration goodbye. And even though some chick at Treasury says there’s a “reasonably high probability” that we’ll get some of the nearly $40B back the two failed behemoths cadged from this administration, I don’t see her betting her own McMansion on that probability.
All in all, we’d have been better off investing in amusement parks or chinchilla farms.
You can kiss the initial $23B flung out by the Bush administration goodbye. And even though some chick at Treasury says there’s a “reasonably high probability” that we’ll get some of the nearly $40B back the two failed behemoths cadged from this administration, I don’t see her betting her own McMansion on that probability.
All in all, we’d have been better off investing in amusement parks or chinchilla farms.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
The GM MBA course
Poor old General Motors—even the “new” GM can’t seem to manage its way out of a paper bag. And it can’t seem to sell off its own toxic assets, which is a key part of it rising from the dead.
The Associated Press reports that the company is squabbling with Germany over dumping its Opel/Vauxhall unit. GM’s scrapped the proposed sale to a group headed by Canadian auto parts manufacturer Magna, even though the deal was backed by €4.5B ($6 B) from the German government.
This despite the fact that Opel is a money pit for GM.
The company seems stuck in the same time warp as some Seattle home sellers—thinking they should be able to get 25% over what they paid for the property two years ago. Hello? That horse is long out of the barn.
Actually, what GM is after is to escape any liability for Opel defaulting on any of its debts in the future.
Well—this corporate weaseling out of responsibility has worked for GM so far. Witness my tax dollars supporting their special welfare system.
On a side “we’re-not-accountable” note, GM has also announced that it’s removing its “Mark of Excellence” logo from whatever it makes going forward. Not that it ever meant much anyhow.
And it’s probably a cost-cutting measure—save on materials and labor—rather than any admission that their products have earned them an ever-diminishing market share over the past few decades.
Really—these clowns would make any B-school proud.
The Associated Press reports that the company is squabbling with Germany over dumping its Opel/Vauxhall unit. GM’s scrapped the proposed sale to a group headed by Canadian auto parts manufacturer Magna, even though the deal was backed by €4.5B ($6 B) from the German government.
This despite the fact that Opel is a money pit for GM.
The company seems stuck in the same time warp as some Seattle home sellers—thinking they should be able to get 25% over what they paid for the property two years ago. Hello? That horse is long out of the barn.
Actually, what GM is after is to escape any liability for Opel defaulting on any of its debts in the future.
Well—this corporate weaseling out of responsibility has worked for GM so far. Witness my tax dollars supporting their special welfare system.
On a side “we’re-not-accountable” note, GM has also announced that it’s removing its “Mark of Excellence” logo from whatever it makes going forward. Not that it ever meant much anyhow.
And it’s probably a cost-cutting measure—save on materials and labor—rather than any admission that their products have earned them an ever-diminishing market share over the past few decades.
Really—these clowns would make any B-school proud.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Prognosis negative
Well, General Motors got a pass in bankruptcy court. US District Judge Robert Gerber has approved GM’s plan to slice and dice its assets at the expense of the usual fall guy: the US taxpayer.
The deal (if I may so characterize it) is that GM’s viable (in the loose sense of the term) will be moved into an entity 61% owned by the US government, and; whatever doesn’t make the cut ends up on the bankruptcy court floor to be picked over by the usual vultures.
What this does is wipe away any unsecured claims, essentially screwing bondholders, retired employees and people who’ve sued the company for building crap cars. GM's management, present and past, are doing the happy dance on that one, no doubt.
It remains to be seen what will be defined as “viable” and what as dross. Even as we speak, the EU is losing unity over which country will get to keep its taxpayers working under whoever buys the Opel unit from GM. So far Germany seems to have the biggest pockets (and the most immediate elections to spur the efforts) to save jobs and the smaller countries like Belgium and Britain are muttering and scuffing their feet in the dust.
But I’m not holding my breath that anything particularly good will come of this.
The deal (if I may so characterize it) is that GM’s viable (in the loose sense of the term) will be moved into an entity 61% owned by the US government, and; whatever doesn’t make the cut ends up on the bankruptcy court floor to be picked over by the usual vultures.
What this does is wipe away any unsecured claims, essentially screwing bondholders, retired employees and people who’ve sued the company for building crap cars. GM's management, present and past, are doing the happy dance on that one, no doubt.
It remains to be seen what will be defined as “viable” and what as dross. Even as we speak, the EU is losing unity over which country will get to keep its taxpayers working under whoever buys the Opel unit from GM. So far Germany seems to have the biggest pockets (and the most immediate elections to spur the efforts) to save jobs and the smaller countries like Belgium and Britain are muttering and scuffing their feet in the dust.
But I’m not holding my breath that anything particularly good will come of this.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
A modest proposal for GM
As you’d expect, Michael Moore has a few things to say about the state of GM. The filmmaker/whackjob (depending on your level of investment in corporate propaganda) who made Roger and Me 20 years ago to document GM’s catastrophic oblivion to the world immediately about it, thinks we all lose if the bankruptcy just allows the company to keep on keeping on (albeit on a smaller scale), seeing as to how “keeping on” has caused far more damage to our society than just making cars people really don’t like.
Growing up in LA, I was told that before WWII there was a nice system of light rail electric transport to get people around the area. Post-war, the oil and auto companies (GM in particular) lobbied heavily that the city should replace that “old-fashioned” system with nice, new, gas-burning buses. And that’s what they did.
And between the buses and the 12,437,677 cars on the roads, it became damned near impossible to get from here to there even on brand-new freeways. And LA for decades wore the crown of the smog capital of the country. (Growing up, I can well recall that painful limit on the depth of breaths you could take in the summer, when smog filled your lungs and; burned your eyes.)
Moore has some suggestions about what the bankruptcy executives could do with GM's remaining resources that don't involve continuing to build internal-combustion cars with the old GM mindset of tail-fins and planned obsolescence.
In general I agree with Moore.
But, as with Roger, probably no one involved in the GM bankruptcy will pay any attention.
Plus ça change…
Growing up in LA, I was told that before WWII there was a nice system of light rail electric transport to get people around the area. Post-war, the oil and auto companies (GM in particular) lobbied heavily that the city should replace that “old-fashioned” system with nice, new, gas-burning buses. And that’s what they did.
And between the buses and the 12,437,677 cars on the roads, it became damned near impossible to get from here to there even on brand-new freeways. And LA for decades wore the crown of the smog capital of the country. (Growing up, I can well recall that painful limit on the depth of breaths you could take in the summer, when smog filled your lungs and; burned your eyes.)
Moore has some suggestions about what the bankruptcy executives could do with GM's remaining resources that don't involve continuing to build internal-combustion cars with the old GM mindset of tail-fins and planned obsolescence.
In general I agree with Moore.
But, as with Roger, probably no one involved in the GM bankruptcy will pay any attention.
Plus ça change…
Monday, June 1, 2009
Motor City's burning
As has been expected for the last 60 days, GM filed for bankruptcy this morning. It was an electronic procedure, almost automated. & the American taxpayers just as automatically forked over another $30B to tide the behemoth over through the expected 60- to 90-day Chapter 11 period.
That’s in addition to the $20B we’ve already flushed down this particular sewer line.
Chrysler, the other automotive welfare mother, has been authorized by its own bankruptcy judge to sell its assets to Fiat. That deal doesn’t involve any real cash, just a promise by Fiat to build cars people will actually buy.
Quelle idée.
People have been watching the Chrysler process to predict what type of bankruptcy we can expect from GM. But the Fiat deal was already circling the body in the water before Chrysler filed, and there’s no one in sight except the US taxpaying chumps for infusing billions into a company that’s shown again and; again that it can’t or won’t reorganize its way out of a paper bag.
So it’s going to be a long, hot summer.
That’s in addition to the $20B we’ve already flushed down this particular sewer line.
Chrysler, the other automotive welfare mother, has been authorized by its own bankruptcy judge to sell its assets to Fiat. That deal doesn’t involve any real cash, just a promise by Fiat to build cars people will actually buy.
Quelle idée.
People have been watching the Chrysler process to predict what type of bankruptcy we can expect from GM. But the Fiat deal was already circling the body in the water before Chrysler filed, and there’s no one in sight except the US taxpaying chumps for infusing billions into a company that’s shown again and; again that it can’t or won’t reorganize its way out of a paper bag.
So it’s going to be a long, hot summer.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Looking in the rear-view mirror
As we wait for GM to announce its descent into bankruptcy, P.J. O’Rourke drives a big car with fins down memory lane for the WSJ.
It doesn’t entirely resonate with me, but I’m sure it represents the Y-chromosome set's attachment to American cars. And it does touch on the massive post-WWII changes in the American national landscape wrought by the auto industry.
You can certainly see it in any housing built after around 1950: there’s always a carport or garage, and usually it’s the first thing you see when you drive up to a residence. Which veritably screams, “We’ve got wheels!”
(Don’t get me wrong—I’m an LA native and where my car goes is pretty much as important to me as whether the place has indoor plumbing. And when I was looking for a house in Seattle I reconciled myself to the fact that there isn’t going to be any street parking for guests because so many of the houses were built in the expectation that no one would have cars, much less three per household, so the curbs are chockablock with residents’ SUVs and Lexuses.)
I myself never owned anything with more than four cylinders, although the vehicle has to be equipped with a sun roof. (A fact that stymied the car dealer in Wales: “But, madam, you’re in the UK!”) Well—and it does need to possess scoot; I’d never drive a Saab without the turbo charge.
But I take O’Rourke’s point: just as Gen-Yers grew up never knowing existence without PCs and video games, I cannot imagine a world without cars, highways and assigned parking spaces. (In my recent house-hunting forays there were townhouses I rejected because it was impossible to get the car into the attached garage.) Even in London that was one of the absolutes of finding a flat.
We’ll see in the next quarter whether GM emerges from its self-inflicted time of trial. But the era O’Rourke reminisces about is definitely long gone.
It doesn’t entirely resonate with me, but I’m sure it represents the Y-chromosome set's attachment to American cars. And it does touch on the massive post-WWII changes in the American national landscape wrought by the auto industry.
You can certainly see it in any housing built after around 1950: there’s always a carport or garage, and usually it’s the first thing you see when you drive up to a residence. Which veritably screams, “We’ve got wheels!”
(Don’t get me wrong—I’m an LA native and where my car goes is pretty much as important to me as whether the place has indoor plumbing. And when I was looking for a house in Seattle I reconciled myself to the fact that there isn’t going to be any street parking for guests because so many of the houses were built in the expectation that no one would have cars, much less three per household, so the curbs are chockablock with residents’ SUVs and Lexuses.)
I myself never owned anything with more than four cylinders, although the vehicle has to be equipped with a sun roof. (A fact that stymied the car dealer in Wales: “But, madam, you’re in the UK!”) Well—and it does need to possess scoot; I’d never drive a Saab without the turbo charge.
But I take O’Rourke’s point: just as Gen-Yers grew up never knowing existence without PCs and video games, I cannot imagine a world without cars, highways and assigned parking spaces. (In my recent house-hunting forays there were townhouses I rejected because it was impossible to get the car into the attached garage.) Even in London that was one of the absolutes of finding a flat.
We’ll see in the next quarter whether GM emerges from its self-inflicted time of trial. But the era O’Rourke reminisces about is definitely long gone.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
D minus four
The clock is ticking for GM—it’s got until Sunday to come up with a restructuring plan that will keep it out of bankruptcy. Word on the street (okay, various broadsheet papers) is that you and I, my fellow tax-chumps, are about to become majority stockholders in the tanking automaker—to the tune of 70%.
The UAW, which appears to be a better negotiator, will come out with 17.5% of the stock, although that’s less than the autoworkers had hoped for. (They're also accepting stock as funding for retiree benefits. Now there's a longshot for you.)
As in the case of Chrysler, GM’s bondholders have tossed their $700 hand-stitched sabots into the machinery, refusing to accept the offer of $0.41 on the dollar for their debts, which (as with Chrysler) is an invitation to bankruptcy.
You know someone’s out of whack when the UAW seem more reasonable.
Especially when you figure that the bondholders are likely to get much less than this offer under bankruptcy.
Comment dit-on en anglais?…schmucks.
Well, whatever. In a few days most of Detroit will be one big garage sale.
The UAW, which appears to be a better negotiator, will come out with 17.5% of the stock, although that’s less than the autoworkers had hoped for. (They're also accepting stock as funding for retiree benefits. Now there's a longshot for you.)
As in the case of Chrysler, GM’s bondholders have tossed their $700 hand-stitched sabots into the machinery, refusing to accept the offer of $0.41 on the dollar for their debts, which (as with Chrysler) is an invitation to bankruptcy.
You know someone’s out of whack when the UAW seem more reasonable.
Especially when you figure that the bondholders are likely to get much less than this offer under bankruptcy.
Comment dit-on en anglais?…schmucks.
Well, whatever. In a few days most of Detroit will be one big garage sale.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
One down, hundreds to go
Well, I’ll be a Corvair convertible: our new(ish) President has cut off the flow of bailout funds and told GM and Chrysler to go back and cough up real plans for restructuring to save themselves from imploding on their own excess.
And, by way of showing his degree of seriousness, he’s given GM CEO Rick Wagoner the sack.
Without severance payment.
Aw, gee—CrockTears™!
(Yeah, okay—he still gets retirement benefits of $23M from his decades of service leading the company—at various levels—into the tanker. But at least he won’t get that ultimate insult of the buyout to get him to leave the executive office before you have to point a gun at his head.)
And for the first time we’re hearing the term “bankruptcy” applied with a degree of seriousness to the automakers. No longer that “too big to go bankrupt” nonsense holding them back from the consequences of the past few decades of their boneheadedness.
Finally, we’re calling a spade a spade here: Obama terms this “a failure of leadership—from Washington to Detroit.”
Well, duh…
Word on the street is Wagoner will be followed shortly down the road to former glory by members of GM’s board.
On the one hand I’m surprised it’s taken so long for those with the cash to act upon the blindingly obvious idea that you shouldn’t trust those who got us into this mess to be able to get us out of it. Especially since the only talent they seem to have displayed is that for lining their own pockets.
On the other hand, I’m surprised that someone acted upon the blindingly obvious idea that you should not hire the foxes to guard the henhouse—especially when the foxes went to your university.
Perhaps this is a sign of good things to come.
Michigan’s Governor, Jennifer Granholm, seasonally termed Wagoner “a sacrificial lamb”. As you’d expect. But, really—I could once again quote Oliver Cromwell in dismissing the Long Parliament, “You have sat too long for any good you have been doing lately…Depart, I say; and let us have done with you. In the name of God, go!”
Amen.
And, by way of showing his degree of seriousness, he’s given GM CEO Rick Wagoner the sack.
Without severance payment.
Aw, gee—CrockTears™!
(Yeah, okay—he still gets retirement benefits of $23M from his decades of service leading the company—at various levels—into the tanker. But at least he won’t get that ultimate insult of the buyout to get him to leave the executive office before you have to point a gun at his head.)
And for the first time we’re hearing the term “bankruptcy” applied with a degree of seriousness to the automakers. No longer that “too big to go bankrupt” nonsense holding them back from the consequences of the past few decades of their boneheadedness.
Finally, we’re calling a spade a spade here: Obama terms this “a failure of leadership—from Washington to Detroit.”
Well, duh…
Word on the street is Wagoner will be followed shortly down the road to former glory by members of GM’s board.
On the one hand I’m surprised it’s taken so long for those with the cash to act upon the blindingly obvious idea that you shouldn’t trust those who got us into this mess to be able to get us out of it. Especially since the only talent they seem to have displayed is that for lining their own pockets.
On the other hand, I’m surprised that someone acted upon the blindingly obvious idea that you should not hire the foxes to guard the henhouse—especially when the foxes went to your university.
Perhaps this is a sign of good things to come.
Michigan’s Governor, Jennifer Granholm, seasonally termed Wagoner “a sacrificial lamb”. As you’d expect. But, really—I could once again quote Oliver Cromwell in dismissing the Long Parliament, “You have sat too long for any good you have been doing lately…Depart, I say; and let us have done with you. In the name of God, go!”
Amen.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Beggars' (soap) opera, Act II
GM and Chrysler have submitted their “restructuring plans” to Congress, who are going to mull them around for a bit before caving to the auto companies’ demands for another $21B of our money to keep them afloat.
GM plans to concentrate on its three strongest global brands, Chevy, Cadillac and Buick, plus GMC trucks. They’ll phase out Saturn (either sell it or let it die), kill Hummer (because who would buy it?) and cut Saab loose.
Chrysler’s talking about gaining concessions from dealers, unions, suppliers and management. Good luck with that.
But I’m not seeing where they say they’re going to build cars the people want to actually, you know, drive. And their lobbying efforts against fuel efficiency continue apace while the execs are holding out their begging bowls.
GM has announced it will cut 47,000 jobs worldwide; but meanwhile they continue incredibly wasteful spending on executive travel (have they never heard of video conferencing?), bonuses and ex-pat programs.
Naturally, the linchpin on which everything hangs is the threat that if the US taxpayers let them die the miserable death they've set themselves up for, they'll take the economy with them. Well, take it further. So Congress is bound to hand over our money to the executive extortionists, which they'll use to no advantage and then come back for more.
Can you say sinkhole? I knew you could.
GM plans to concentrate on its three strongest global brands, Chevy, Cadillac and Buick, plus GMC trucks. They’ll phase out Saturn (either sell it or let it die), kill Hummer (because who would buy it?) and cut Saab loose.
Chrysler’s talking about gaining concessions from dealers, unions, suppliers and management. Good luck with that.
But I’m not seeing where they say they’re going to build cars the people want to actually, you know, drive. And their lobbying efforts against fuel efficiency continue apace while the execs are holding out their begging bowls.
GM has announced it will cut 47,000 jobs worldwide; but meanwhile they continue incredibly wasteful spending on executive travel (have they never heard of video conferencing?), bonuses and ex-pat programs.
Naturally, the linchpin on which everything hangs is the threat that if the US taxpayers let them die the miserable death they've set themselves up for, they'll take the economy with them. Well, take it further. So Congress is bound to hand over our money to the executive extortionists, which they'll use to no advantage and then come back for more.
Can you say sinkhole? I knew you could.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Interred with their bones
Well, Bush has taken advantage of his last month in office to bail out the Gang of Three, despite the obvious mood of we-the-people, tired of having our collective pockets picked to fund the lifestyles of the grotesquely rich and feckless. Chrysler—which probably won’t survive even with its share—and GM are getting $13.4B right away, with another $4B in the next two months.
This “low-interest loan” comes with strings attached, dictating sacrifices—mostly by workers, who are mandated to take wage cuts, lose their jobs-bank funding and have the UAW take responsibility for the healthcare of retirees.
Yeah, GM’s 25 top execs won’t get bonuses for a few months; boo-hoo.
It’s not enough. The top 25 execs should get the sack and new management brought in to replace them. And anyone with a V anywhere in his title should take a salary cut and get no bonus until the company is in the black.
But beyond that, Bush has created a “plan” that’s vague in terms of requirements and metrics. Not surprising, given that this is yet another un-thought-out scheme of this administration with no idea beyond the immediate crisis. (“Long-term” for this crowd is Thursday. Thursday morning.) This means that all the lobbying and jockeying that will inevitably occur as each constituent tries to convince Congress, the Executive and the people that sacrifices should be made by someone else—this will all be on Obama’s watch.
So, no surprise there, then.
Shakespeare was right: the evil that men do does indeed live after them. And this evil is going to be swirling long after Bush has donated all his coloring books to his presidential library and after the Gang of Three's executives have driven in their SUVs to ruin other industries, with severance packages that would fund the retirements of thousands of line workers.
As for the good allegedly interred with their bones? Not seeing any. The auto industry is saved from bankruptcy? Who says? It's not at all clear to me that $17.4B is anything except money tossed down a particularly foul sewer. Thousands of jobs saved? For a while. But way too many of them are useless or incompetent layers of management; and you know they'll be the last to go under this restructuring.
Not to state the blindingly obvious, but this world is just whacked.
This “low-interest loan” comes with strings attached, dictating sacrifices—mostly by workers, who are mandated to take wage cuts, lose their jobs-bank funding and have the UAW take responsibility for the healthcare of retirees.
Yeah, GM’s 25 top execs won’t get bonuses for a few months; boo-hoo.
It’s not enough. The top 25 execs should get the sack and new management brought in to replace them. And anyone with a V anywhere in his title should take a salary cut and get no bonus until the company is in the black.
But beyond that, Bush has created a “plan” that’s vague in terms of requirements and metrics. Not surprising, given that this is yet another un-thought-out scheme of this administration with no idea beyond the immediate crisis. (“Long-term” for this crowd is Thursday. Thursday morning.) This means that all the lobbying and jockeying that will inevitably occur as each constituent tries to convince Congress, the Executive and the people that sacrifices should be made by someone else—this will all be on Obama’s watch.
So, no surprise there, then.
Shakespeare was right: the evil that men do does indeed live after them. And this evil is going to be swirling long after Bush has donated all his coloring books to his presidential library and after the Gang of Three's executives have driven in their SUVs to ruin other industries, with severance packages that would fund the retirements of thousands of line workers.
As for the good allegedly interred with their bones? Not seeing any. The auto industry is saved from bankruptcy? Who says? It's not at all clear to me that $17.4B is anything except money tossed down a particularly foul sewer. Thousands of jobs saved? For a while. But way too many of them are useless or incompetent layers of management; and you know they'll be the last to go under this restructuring.
Not to state the blindingly obvious, but this world is just whacked.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Surprising & amazing GM
Okay, you’ll recall an email GM sent to a colleague assuring him that GM’s not responsible for the mess they’re in and that they’re doing everything possible to undo the damage they didn’t do and if he (the colleague) didn’t contact his congressslime to have them bail out GM the world would end?
They’re at it again.
And you’ll be surprised and amazed to discover that they don’t mention having made any mistakes briefly admitted in the full-page ad they took out in the trades a week ago.
If you’re feeling like a giggle, read on. You just can’t make this stuff up.
----- Forwarded Message ----
Thank you for being a GM customer. There's been a lot of discussion about the auto industry over the past few weeks, and I want to make sure you know the facts about GM. This is important because with all the media coverage of late about our company and industry, it is evident that there is much misinformation and many very dated perceptions being communicated. The truth and the facts are always helpful. First, we're building our best cars and trucks ever, and we're committed to being the best car company on the planet.
[“Truth”? “Facts”? As if.]
Take a closer look at Chevrolet, Buick, Pontiac, GMC, Saturn, HUMMER, Saab and Cadillac. You'll be surprised.
Our vehicles are more fuel efficient.
19 of our 2009 models have an EPA estimated 30 MPG highway or better — more than Toyota, more than Honda
[Okay, I counted more than 90 models of their eight brands. So 19 may be a fact; but it’s not really truthful or useful information.]
For 2009, we offer more hybrid choices than any other manufacturer. We currently have six hybrids, by mid-2009 we will introduce three more, and by 2012 we will offer 15 hybrid models
11 of our last 13 new-product introductions have been fuel-efficient cars or crossovers. This trend will continue with 22 of our next 24 new-product introductions
Higher quality.
We back our quality with the Best Coverage in America:
A 100,000-Mile/5-Year Transferable Powertrain Limited Warranty.(1) Plus, Roadside Assistance(1) and Courtesy Transportation Programs.(1) This coverage is superior to Toyota, Honda, Nissan and Ford. We believe in our quality and reliability, and we back it up!
[Well, but people regularly put 200K miles on their Toyotas and Hondas, so the question arises: why does GM think they need 100K mile/5-year warranties?]
The 2008 Chevy Malibu and Chevy Silverado were the "Highest Ranked Midsize Car and Large Pickup in Initial Quality" according to J.D. Power and Associates(2)
Safe.
37 of our 2009 models have five-star frontal crash safety ratings(3)
['Kay, remember: more than 90 models. So apparently GM thinks having only 40% of their models five-star rated is noteworthy.]
We offer the safety and security of OnStar,(4) including Automatic Crash Response,(5) OnStar Vehicle Diagnostics(6) and Turn-by-Turn Navigation.(7) Not Honda. Not Toyota. Not Ford. Not Chrysler. Not Nissan. Not Dodge
[Of course, you PAY for this safety and security, an annual subscription. I hope they’ve improved since I tried it—a GPS device works much better than their humanoid location finding/routing service.]
The proof is on the road today.
All made by GM. Surprised?
Here's something else amazing: the Red Tag Sales Event,(25) which continues through January 5, 2009. The price on the tag is the price you pay. See some red, save some green.
It's a smart time to buy GM. Visit gm.com for more surprising reasons why.
Sincerely,
Mark LaNeve
This is an email advertisement. If you prefer not to receive any unsolicited marketing emails regarding GM vehicles, click here.
They’re at it again.
And you’ll be surprised and amazed to discover that they don’t mention having made any mistakes briefly admitted in the full-page ad they took out in the trades a week ago.
If you’re feeling like a giggle, read on. You just can’t make this stuff up.
----- Forwarded Message ----
From: Your GM Team Your_GM_Team@email.generalmotors.bfi0.co
To:
Sent: Monday, December 15, 2008 5:26:50 AM
Subject: Surprising today. Amazing tomorrow. It's GM
[I’m not making up that subject line; that came straight from GM.]
Dear [one-time GM Car Owner because we can’t be bothered to find out you’re no longer in the “family”],
Thank you for being a GM customer. There's been a lot of discussion about the auto industry over the past few weeks, and I want to make sure you know the facts about GM. This is important because with all the media coverage of late about our company and industry, it is evident that there is much misinformation and many very dated perceptions being communicated. The truth and the facts are always helpful. First, we're building our best cars and trucks ever, and we're committed to being the best car company on the planet.
[“Truth”? “Facts”? As if.]
Take a closer look at Chevrolet, Buick, Pontiac, GMC, Saturn, HUMMER, Saab and Cadillac. You'll be surprised.
Our vehicles are more fuel efficient.
19 of our 2009 models have an EPA estimated 30 MPG highway or better — more than Toyota, more than Honda
[Okay, I counted more than 90 models of their eight brands. So 19 may be a fact; but it’s not really truthful or useful information.]
For 2009, we offer more hybrid choices than any other manufacturer. We currently have six hybrids, by mid-2009 we will introduce three more, and by 2012 we will offer 15 hybrid models
11 of our last 13 new-product introductions have been fuel-efficient cars or crossovers. This trend will continue with 22 of our next 24 new-product introductions
Higher quality.
We back our quality with the Best Coverage in America:
A 100,000-Mile/5-Year Transferable Powertrain Limited Warranty.(1) Plus, Roadside Assistance(1) and Courtesy Transportation Programs.(1) This coverage is superior to Toyota, Honda, Nissan and Ford. We believe in our quality and reliability, and we back it up!
[Well, but people regularly put 200K miles on their Toyotas and Hondas, so the question arises: why does GM think they need 100K mile/5-year warranties?]
The 2008 Chevy Malibu and Chevy Silverado were the "Highest Ranked Midsize Car and Large Pickup in Initial Quality" according to J.D. Power and Associates(2)
Safe.
37 of our 2009 models have five-star frontal crash safety ratings(3)
['Kay, remember: more than 90 models. So apparently GM thinks having only 40% of their models five-star rated is noteworthy.]
We offer the safety and security of OnStar,(4) including Automatic Crash Response,(5) OnStar Vehicle Diagnostics(6) and Turn-by-Turn Navigation.(7) Not Honda. Not Toyota. Not Ford. Not Chrysler. Not Nissan. Not Dodge
[Of course, you PAY for this safety and security, an annual subscription. I hope they’ve improved since I tried it—a GPS device works much better than their humanoid location finding/routing service.]
The proof is on the road today.
Chevy
The Cobalt XFE offers an EPA estimated 37 MPG highway. More than Toyota Corolla or Honda Civic DX8
The Malibu offers an EPA estimated 33 MPG highway, which is better than Toyota Camry LE or Honda Accord(9)
The Traverse offers the best highway fuel economy of any eight-passenger crossover,10 an EPA estimated 24 MPG highway. It has more interior space than Honda Pilot or Toyota Highlander
The Silverado is Car and Driver's Best Pickup 2 years running.(11) The Silverado XFE offers an EPA estimated 21 MPG highway. No other large pickup beats it. Not Ford. Not Dodge. Nobody.(12)
[But, um, who exactly is buying large pickups?]
Buick • Pontiac • GMC
The eight-passenger Buick Enclave crossover is quieter than Lexus RX 350.(13) And with an EPA estimated 24 MPG highway, it gets better highway gas mileage than Lexus RX 350 and Acura MDX(14)
The Pontiac G5 XFE offers an EPA estimated 37 MPG highway. More than Toyota Corolla or Honda Civic DX(8)
[But they’re planning on tossing away most of Pontiac, so why are they pishing about it here?]
The GMC Sierra XFE offers an EPA estimated 21 MPG highway. No other large pickup offers better highway mileage. Not Toyota. Nobody.(15)
[Um, see above about nobody buying large pickups. Nobody.]
Saturn
The AURA midsize sedan offers best-in-class(16) highway fuel economy. Its EPA estimated 33 MPG highway beats Toyota Camry LE and Honda Accord17
The VUE Hybrid has the best highway fuel economy in its segment:(18) an EPA estimated 32 MPG
[Yeah—Saturn’s one of the brands they’re trying to dump altogether.]
Cadillac • Saab • HUMMER
The Cadillac CTS is a 2009 "Best Resale Value" Award winner from Kelley Blue Book's kbb.com.(19) It is one of Car and Driver's 2009 10Best. And it was also selected a top safety pick by the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety(20)
The Cadillac Escalade Hybrid eight-passenger luxury SUV offers an EPA estimated 20 MPG city. Better than a 2008 MINI Cooper S Convertible with automatic transmission(21)
[How pathetic is comparing a Cadillac SUV with a Mini Cooper?]
The Saab 9-3 Sport Sedan, SportCombi and Convertible have earned the 2009 Insurance Institute for Highway Safety's "Top Safety Pick" award in the midsize category for the third straight year(22)
[Okay, they’ve been talking about selling off Saab for at least six years.]
The HUMMER H3 has a lower annual fuel cost than Nissan Pathfinder(23)
[If you leave it in the garage.]
And our future looks even brighter.
The upcoming Chevy Volt (expected launch date late 2010) represents a fundamental reinvention of the American automobile industry. The Volt will deliver up to 40 miles(24) on a single electrical charge, well within the daily commute of nearly 80% of Americans. It represents a giant step toward energy independence
[And how many decades did GM fight the idea of building any car that didn't suck up fossil fuel like frat boys at a kegger?]
GM will also continue to invest in hydrogen fuel cell technology, which is capable of reducing automobile tailpipe emissions to non-polluting water vapor. Already, GM has deployed 90 Chevy Equinox compact SUVs to people in what constitutes the world's largest market test fleet of hydrogen fuel cell vehicles
The Cobalt XFE offers an EPA estimated 37 MPG highway. More than Toyota Corolla or Honda Civic DX8
The Malibu offers an EPA estimated 33 MPG highway, which is better than Toyota Camry LE or Honda Accord(9)
The Traverse offers the best highway fuel economy of any eight-passenger crossover,10 an EPA estimated 24 MPG highway. It has more interior space than Honda Pilot or Toyota Highlander
The Silverado is Car and Driver's Best Pickup 2 years running.(11) The Silverado XFE offers an EPA estimated 21 MPG highway. No other large pickup beats it. Not Ford. Not Dodge. Nobody.(12)
[But, um, who exactly is buying large pickups?]
Buick • Pontiac • GMC
The eight-passenger Buick Enclave crossover is quieter than Lexus RX 350.(13) And with an EPA estimated 24 MPG highway, it gets better highway gas mileage than Lexus RX 350 and Acura MDX(14)
The Pontiac G5 XFE offers an EPA estimated 37 MPG highway. More than Toyota Corolla or Honda Civic DX(8)
[But they’re planning on tossing away most of Pontiac, so why are they pishing about it here?]
The GMC Sierra XFE offers an EPA estimated 21 MPG highway. No other large pickup offers better highway mileage. Not Toyota. Nobody.(15)
[Um, see above about nobody buying large pickups. Nobody.]
Saturn
The AURA midsize sedan offers best-in-class(16) highway fuel economy. Its EPA estimated 33 MPG highway beats Toyota Camry LE and Honda Accord17
The VUE Hybrid has the best highway fuel economy in its segment:(18) an EPA estimated 32 MPG
[Yeah—Saturn’s one of the brands they’re trying to dump altogether.]
Cadillac • Saab • HUMMER
The Cadillac CTS is a 2009 "Best Resale Value" Award winner from Kelley Blue Book's kbb.com.(19) It is one of Car and Driver's 2009 10Best. And it was also selected a top safety pick by the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety(20)
The Cadillac Escalade Hybrid eight-passenger luxury SUV offers an EPA estimated 20 MPG city. Better than a 2008 MINI Cooper S Convertible with automatic transmission(21)
[How pathetic is comparing a Cadillac SUV with a Mini Cooper?]
The Saab 9-3 Sport Sedan, SportCombi and Convertible have earned the 2009 Insurance Institute for Highway Safety's "Top Safety Pick" award in the midsize category for the third straight year(22)
[Okay, they’ve been talking about selling off Saab for at least six years.]
The HUMMER H3 has a lower annual fuel cost than Nissan Pathfinder(23)
[If you leave it in the garage.]
And our future looks even brighter.
The upcoming Chevy Volt (expected launch date late 2010) represents a fundamental reinvention of the American automobile industry. The Volt will deliver up to 40 miles(24) on a single electrical charge, well within the daily commute of nearly 80% of Americans. It represents a giant step toward energy independence
[And how many decades did GM fight the idea of building any car that didn't suck up fossil fuel like frat boys at a kegger?]
GM will also continue to invest in hydrogen fuel cell technology, which is capable of reducing automobile tailpipe emissions to non-polluting water vapor. Already, GM has deployed 90 Chevy Equinox compact SUVs to people in what constitutes the world's largest market test fleet of hydrogen fuel cell vehicles
All made by GM. Surprised?
Here's something else amazing: the Red Tag Sales Event,(25) which continues through January 5, 2009. The price on the tag is the price you pay. See some red, save some green.
[Ah, right--the commercial. You knew this was coming, didn't you?]
It's a smart time to buy GM. Visit gm.com for more surprising reasons why.
Sincerely,
Mark LaNeve
This is an email advertisement. If you prefer not to receive any unsolicited marketing emails regarding GM vehicles, click here.
1) Whichever comes first. Excludes 2009 Saab vehicles. See dealer for limited warranty details.
2) Chevrolet Malibu and Chevrolet Silverado LD received the lowest number of problems per 100 vehicles among midsize cars and large pickups, respectively, in the proprietary J.D. Power and Associates 2008 Initial Quality StudySM. Study based on responses from 81,530 new-vehicle owners, measuring 344 models and measures opinions after 90 days of ownership. Proprietary study results are based on experiences and perceptions of owners surveyed in February–April 2008. Your experiences may vary. Visit jdpower.com.
3) Government star ratings are part of the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration's (NHTSA's) New Car Assessment Program (www.safercar.gov).
4) Call 1-888-4-ONSTAR (466-7827) or visit onstar.com for details and system limitations.
5) Available on select 2007 and newer GM models.
6) Capabilities vary by model. Visit onstar.com for details and system limitations.
7) Requires ABS and Directions & Connections Plan. Not available in certain areas. Visit onstar.com for coverage map. Not available on Pontiac Vibe and Saab 9-3 and 9-5.
8) Comparable Toyota Corolla with an EPA estimated MPG 35 highway and Honda Civic DX with an EPA estimated MPG 34 highway.
9) Malibu with available 4-cylinder engine and 6-speed automatic transmission. Comparable Honda Accord and Toyota Camry LE, both with an EPA estimated 31 MPG highway.
10) Based on GM Mid-Utility Crossover segment. Excludes other GM vehicles.
11) Car and Driver 2008.
12) Based on GM Large Pickup segment and Silverado XFE with 5.3L V8 engine and an EPA estimated MPG 15 city, 21 highway. Ford F-150 SFE with 4.6L V8 engine and an EPA estimated MPG 15 city, 21 highway. Dodge RAM 2WD with 5.7L V8 engine and an EPA estimated MPG 14 city, 20 highway. Excludes other GM vehicles.
13) Based on independent testing.
14) Buick Enclave FWD, Lexus RX 350 FWD and an EPA estimated 23 MPG highway, Acura MDX and an EPA estimated 20 MPG highway. 15) Based on GM Large Pickup segment. Toyota Tundra 2WD with 5.7L V8 engine and an EPA estimated MPG 14 city, 18 highway. Excludes other GM vehicles.
16) Based on GM Mid-Car Sedan segment and an EPA estimated MPG 33 highway (gas), MPG 34 highway (hybrid). Excludes other GM vehicles.
17) Saturn AURA with available 4-cylinder engine and 6-speed automatic transmission. Comparable Honda Accord and Toyota Camry LE, both with an EPA estimated MPG 31 highway.
18) Based on GM Compact SUV-Crossover segment and EPA estimated MPG 32 highway.
19) Vehicle's projected resale value is specific to the 2009 model year. For more information, visit Kelley Blue Book's kbb.com. Kelley Blue Book is a registered trademark of Kelley Blue Book Co., Inc.
20) Based on IIHS segmentation and testing results. IIHS results based on front-, side- and rear-impact tests and the availability of Electronic Stability Control.
21) 2008 MINI Cooper S Convertible with automatic transmission and an EPA estimated 19 MPG city. 22) Saab 9-3: Based on IIHS segmentation and testing results. IIHS results based on front-, side- and rear-impact tests and the availability of Electronic Stability Control.
23) Based on EPA Annual Fuel Costs and EPA estimated MPG. H3 EPA estimated MPG 14 city, 18 highway. Pathfinder EPA estimated MPG 14 city, 20 highway (premium fuel recommended).
24) Assumes fully charged battery. Actual range may vary depending on driving habits and conditions. Vehicle features and performance capabilities subject to change without notice.
25) Tax, title, license, dealer fees and optional equipment extra. Not available with some other offers. At participating dealers only. Take delivery by 1/5/09. See dealer for details.
The marks of General Motors, its divisions, slogans, emblems, vehicle model names, vehicle body designs and other marks appearing in this email are the trademarks and/or service marks of General Motors Corporation, its subsidiaries, affiliates or licensors. ©2008 GM Corp.
Buckle up, America!
General Motors Corporation
100 Renaissance Center 482-A00-MAR
Detroit, MI 48265
Friday, December 5, 2008
Act II--enter three clowns
God bless Richard C. Shelby, R-Alabama. He refused to swallow any of the faux-contrite ersatz-sincere Kool-Aid offered by the Gang of Three at yesterday’s repeat engagement of loser automakers vs. the US Senate.
He pointed out the blindingly obvious (to everyone except Ford, GM and Chrysler): “The firms continue to trail their major competitors in almost every category necessary to compete.” And the automobile tycoons would be the first to trumpet that if you can’t compete you shouldn’t be in the business.
As for their vaunted “see—no corporate jets, we drove here in the cheapest-ass pieces of crap we can produce, which we ordinarily wouldn’t touch outside of a Vegas car show but which we’ve foisted off on the car-buying public, whom we consider the biggest suckers in the universe, except for their legally-elected representatives” stunt…Shelby inquired, “Did you drive or did you have a driver? Did you drive a little and ride a little? And secondly, I guess are you going to drive back?”
After being utterly shocked two weeks ago when just showing up at the Capitol and saying they need $25B or they’ll start putting millions out of work didn’t result in Congress immediately depositing the money in their offshore accounts, they’ve coughed up (under duress) “business plans” on how they’d spend this money differently than they’ve spent the billions they’ve gone through in the past couple of years.
I’ve not had a chance to really look at them—not that I expect these alleged plans to contain any more actual, you know, substance than they think they absolutely need to show to get their mitts on the dough.
Ford’s now saying they don’t need a loan—just a line of credit. (Which they’ll tap into faster than boiled asparagus when they think the media scrutiny is lifted.)
GM is seriously pathetic: now their story is that if they don’t get $4B before month’s end, it’s curtains. But the $4B won’t be enough, actually; they’ll want another $4B in January, a total of $12 in “loans” and a $6B line of credit.
Now, I’m not an MBA, but saying $4B isn’t enough to get them through the next three weeks doesn’t inspire a great deal of confidence in their ability to manage their way out of a Gucci bag.
What also disturbs me is their assumption that they can spread any amount of manure around and have everyone believing they’re in the Garden of Eden.
(Well, I suppose the precedent has been established—it worked for AIG, Citicorp and Bear Sterns. They coughed and the Treasury handed them a $700B box of Kleenex.)
For the moment, it looks as though the Senators are displaying more backbone than they’ve done in the past. I really hope this lasts. I don’t like being the victim of extortion, whether it’s the thug in the hood or the CEO in a hybrid.
He pointed out the blindingly obvious (to everyone except Ford, GM and Chrysler): “The firms continue to trail their major competitors in almost every category necessary to compete.” And the automobile tycoons would be the first to trumpet that if you can’t compete you shouldn’t be in the business.
As for their vaunted “see—no corporate jets, we drove here in the cheapest-ass pieces of crap we can produce, which we ordinarily wouldn’t touch outside of a Vegas car show but which we’ve foisted off on the car-buying public, whom we consider the biggest suckers in the universe, except for their legally-elected representatives” stunt…Shelby inquired, “Did you drive or did you have a driver? Did you drive a little and ride a little? And secondly, I guess are you going to drive back?”
After being utterly shocked two weeks ago when just showing up at the Capitol and saying they need $25B or they’ll start putting millions out of work didn’t result in Congress immediately depositing the money in their offshore accounts, they’ve coughed up (under duress) “business plans” on how they’d spend this money differently than they’ve spent the billions they’ve gone through in the past couple of years.
I’ve not had a chance to really look at them—not that I expect these alleged plans to contain any more actual, you know, substance than they think they absolutely need to show to get their mitts on the dough.
Ford’s now saying they don’t need a loan—just a line of credit. (Which they’ll tap into faster than boiled asparagus when they think the media scrutiny is lifted.)
GM is seriously pathetic: now their story is that if they don’t get $4B before month’s end, it’s curtains. But the $4B won’t be enough, actually; they’ll want another $4B in January, a total of $12 in “loans” and a $6B line of credit.
Now, I’m not an MBA, but saying $4B isn’t enough to get them through the next three weeks doesn’t inspire a great deal of confidence in their ability to manage their way out of a Gucci bag.
What also disturbs me is their assumption that they can spread any amount of manure around and have everyone believing they’re in the Garden of Eden.
(Well, I suppose the precedent has been established—it worked for AIG, Citicorp and Bear Sterns. They coughed and the Treasury handed them a $700B box of Kleenex.)
For the moment, it looks as though the Senators are displaying more backbone than they’ve done in the past. I really hope this lasts. I don’t like being the victim of extortion, whether it’s the thug in the hood or the CEO in a hybrid.
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