Let me start this out by promising you that I’m hard-put
to find a Christmas song better geared to make me start banging my head against
the wall than “Little Drummer Boy.”
I mean—that “Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire” jobber
is pretty sick-making. But for shear wild-eyed get-me-outta-here, shoot-me-now
mania, “Drummer Boy” is my primordial nightmare.
However, I’m almost rethinking my stance on this one,
because:
If you can watch this video without projectile snorting whatever
you might be in the process of drinking, you are one Scroogy dude.
This is so much better than the David Bowie/Bing Crosby version, which still takes high honors for WTF-iness and does make a great
icebreaker if the punch at your Christmas party has gone a little flat.
But now, I’m never going to be able to hear any version
of this lugubrious piece without picturing those patient dogs at the keyboards, bongos
and cello, playing their, er, parts like they know there will be bowlfuls of
treats once they get those silly outfits off.
Also—having the actual drummer boy wearing a Chanukah tee
shirt and playing like Animal in the Muppets’ band just changes the whole
sensibility of the thing.
Somebody needs to write a dissertation on this.
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