Recruiters 12

Well, this is a new one on me—an unsolicited email arrived yesterday in the queue of the email account I use for career correspondence, allegedly from a humanoid recruiter. Here’s the gist:

“Hi there,

“My name is [Name Redacted, because some people Google themselves on the Web & actually find & comment on my posts], and I am a Senior Recruiter here at Taleo.

“I've seen your resume within our database and thought that you might have the skills and experience for this dynamic opportunity based in Dublin, CA.
“After reviewing the attached position description, the first step is to review and reply to the questions below.

“These responses will allow the hiring manager to obtain a nice "snapshot" of your background prior to our follow-up call to discuss your responses.
I will be setting up that call so let me know your availability for the next week.

“If you could attach your resume to the reply email, that would be great!
Thanks again,
[Name Redacted]”

Now, here’s what I think is comment-worthy:

1. I haven’t applied to anything at Taleo itself; I’ve only used their web application to submit applications to companies that subscribe to the software. I haven’t found it to be particularly user/applicant-friendly, but I recognize that this is to some degree a function of the way the subscribing companies have configured it to meet their own arcane screen-them-out requirements, so I’m not holding a grudge against them.

2. This means that Taleo has set up an algorithm to scrape out information from the applications that candidates have submitted to Taleo’s clients, which kind of creeps me out.

3. I of course can’t tell if [Name Redacted] is real, or whether this is a system-disgorged email—it does have a humanoid email address, & there’s a signature block that also has a phone number. But I would not put it past companies to have the corporate equivalent of dial-a-prayer contact details, since they’re much more concerned about not being bothered by applicants than they are about connecting with candidates.

4. If [Name Redacted] is real & really sent this email, I’m not impressed by the idea that he’s working at 1330 on a Sunday. It doesn’t speak to a corporate culture that values the old work-life balance.

5. I’m wondering what Taleo’s algorithm saw in my profile, or what process {Name Redacted] (if he’s a humanoid) followed to send me the email, as the position is for an Alliances Operations Manager, a function I have never performed in my long career of just about everything except pro basketball player & Sherpa. I believe my CV has the words “alliance partners” in one place, with reference to work I did supporting sales teams. How could that possibly kick out my profile in a search for persons with actual, you know, prior experience?

6. However, old [Name Redacted] (or his algo) certainly seems confident about the match—he’s already demanding I give him times for a screening phone call next week.

7. The questions I’m meant to review & respond to would definitely screen me out before any phone call—the very first one asks: “After reviewing the position description, what ‘fit’ do you see between this particular role & your skills & experience?” Uh, not really a whole lot. The third one asks how many years of experience in partner/alliance roles; & the seventh wants to know if I’ve made presentations to senior & executive level management on alliance opportunities or strategies.

I make it a point to blow off as few humanoids as possible, even recruiters who don’t seem to have a firm grasp on the plot, so I’ll reply with something. My challenge is to find the kindest way to say, “check your software calibration, because I’m not really in the same time zone as the requirements for this position.”

Why couldn’t it have been an unsolicited inquiry for a product manager, or for an international change management professional?