Music for war

I’ll take a break from the psychopathology of octuplets and the moral turpitude and fiscal fecklessness of corporate executive management, and share this story from the WSJ on music as a mode of torture.

You may recall that in 1989 US troops used loud music as a siege weapon against Manuel Noriega, holed up in the Apostolic Nunciature in Panama City. They stopped after the Pope complained to Bush 41.

That’s not exactly what we’re talking about here. Clive Stafford Smith, director of British human rights organization Reprieve, details the tactics used in current operations in a June 2008 story in the Guardian. It is indeed serious business.

Still, you wonder as some of the choices of omission as well as commission in the military’s list: What’s up with “American Pie”? Leaving aside the point that anything played at sufficient volume will make your ears bleed, what’s objectionable about “American Pie”? Is it the good old boys drinkin’ whiskey and rye? Or the levee being dry?

And the Sesame Street theme? Well, perhaps a bit on the super-sunny side; but surely not in the realm of that ghastly Barney theme. Play that just once, at normal volume, and I’ll tell you anything you want to know.

But how is it possible that “It’s a Small World” isn’t on that list? Even thinking about it makes your teeth ache. Or anything by Abba? Or…can you say Minnie Riperton?

So, what would music would you include in the next iteration of the Geneva Convention?