Apocalypse now...maybe...again...

Oh, crap—Houston, we have an apocalypse. Again.

This time it’s the fault of those pesky Vikings. According to a report in The Independent, tomorrow the Earth will split open, releasing the inhabitants of Hell (Hel in their terms; if you’re a Viking you apparently don’t need no stinkin’ second “l” in your underworld address), and the Norse gods are fixing to rumble. 

It's Ragnarök, baby.

It’ll be the Crips and the Bloods by an order of magnitude, which will naturally cause everything to fall into the ocean. Because, you know, that’s the way it crumbles, Armageddon-wise.

(And if you're waiting for delivery of an online order, perhaps you should have sprung for the express shipping option. Just sayin'.)

I'm a little concerned, though, because apparently after everything goes down the cosmic drain, it's going to be up to two humans to repopulate the world? Does it not seem like we've been through this before? With not very positive results? Why would we want to keep doing this over again? Also, what happens to all the animals? How are we suppose to reboot again if it's only humans? Pretty soon, one will eat the other, and there we'll be. Not very good design, in my opinion.

To tell you the truth—after the failures of such presumed prognosticating powerhouses as Harold Camping and the Maya to separately (and in Camping’s case, more than once) predict an accurate apocalypse, I’m beginning to lose faith in this kind of thing.

Anyhow, I don’t know how you’re supposed to prepare for a Viking apocalypse—am I meant to make sure my house is clean? Sprinkle some sort of herbs about? Drink a lot of Absolut? I just dunno.

Well—see you Monday. 

Maybe.