Thursday, October 20, 2011

Cat burglary, Brit-style

Alright, it’s a few weeks old, but it makes a bit of a change from Republican whack-job tax “plans”, riots in Greece and mega-banks getting risibly low “penalties” for committing massive long-term fraud on their depositors, their investors and the US taxpayers.

The estranged wife of a British Lib-Dem MP has been convicted of catnapping.

No, no—not sneaking a snooze on the job. Feloniously ferreting a feline away from the home of her presumably-soon-to-be-ex-husband’s mistress.

Christine Hemming, 53, doesn’t deny doing it—which would be difficult, as she was caught with the cat on CCTV. She just denies having any clue as to why she would have done it.

I suppose that’s the British equivalent of the “by reason of mental defect or disease” defense. She claims she tried stuffing the kitten, named Beauty, under the fence of a neighbor’s yard—whether in an attempt to restore it to its human or to just ditch the evidence she doesn’t say. But of course, you can’t expect a cat to cooperate and no one’s seen Beauty since then.

I don’t know whether this is a felony or misdemeanor; nor do I know when she’ll be sentenced.

What I really find disturbing is that Beauty has a male littermate, and that John Hemming, MP, named the poor bugger Twinkle.

Now, there’s the real high crime.



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