Super food

Well, hmm—I knew this was probably cued up: a new epidemic in the post-gluten, all-kale-all-the-time world that we face.

Yes, an epidemic of youths (or, in some areas, youts) facing another ten years in their parents’ basements, desperately trying to obliterate their anxieties about college entrance exams and failure to secure Series A investment in their app that’s the Uber of grunge bands with…

Well, just watch. If you dare.

This trend may have begun in the UK, as you can tell from the language (helpfully subtitled), but so did the fascinator.

Do you want to see either of these things in your subdivision? I mean—what happens when they start wearing the kale on their heads? We may indeed be looking into the face of Armageddon.