Member matters

Following on yesterday's post, and filed under either W, T or F, a study published this week in the BJU International urology journal establishes the, um, average size of the human penis. It’s 13.12cm/5.16in erect; 11.66cm/9.16cm/3.6in flaccid.

The researchers collated measurements of more than 15,000 penises of men around the world, which must have made for interesting “what did you do at work” conversations with friends and families. It’s not entirely clear to me why, but I suppose the words “because”, “we” and “could” enter into it.

Also because they presumably got funding from somewhere.

(I was wondering how much a supply of sterile, disposable tape measures cost them? But then it turned out that this team didn’t actually go forth and measure; they just pulled, um, together metrics that were already out there. Although God knows why that would be.)

Also, I don’t know whether the notion that the results should help “reassure the large majority of men that the size of their penis is in the normal range” was part of the intention, or just one of the results. They even have a graph that healthcare providers can whip out when treating men with “small penis anxiety”.

They apparently didn’t find any correlation between the size of a man’s foot and the length of his penis. No mention of checking noses.

I liked the comment that while this study may be useful in reassuring men worried about their size, it might “have the unintended effect of denting the egos of those who thought they were abnormally well-endowed.”

And there we have the world in a nutshell: when it comes to men, you just can’t win.