We talk, you listen

Carrying on with this week’s theme of women in science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM), here’s something else that emerged from last week’s Grace Hopper Celebration in Phoenix. You know, the site of Microsoft’s Satya Nadella’s verbal suicide attempt.

There was a session on Male Allies for women in tech, billed as an opportunity to discuss how tech companies are making the effort to welcome women into their halls, and the ways men and women can change the testosterone-fueled culture in those very companies.. The “plenary” panel consisted of Facebook CTO Mike Schroepfer; Google's SVP of search Alan Eustace; Blake Irving, CEO of GoDaddy; and Tayloe Stansbury, CTO of Intuit.

There was already pushback at the inclusion of Irving, as GoDaddy’s got a history of in-your-face sexism both internally and in the way they present their service through their advertising. And then, after delivering some anodyne claptrap, the panel declined to engage in a Q&A session.

Because “engagement” was clearly not their intention.

But—kind of like Nadella’s advice on how women should approach getting pay increases and promotions—while the high-tech hierarchs might have thought they were really earning karmic credits by issuing statements on how they really dig the chicks and so no problem, really, what they were actually doing was demonstrating how wide-spread the problem is, and how far everyone has to go just to get their heads around it.

Because these men clearly consider themselves in the vanguard of doing-the-right-thing for diversity; and their idea of doing the right thing does not include discussion.

It did, however, include such advice as “excel, and…push through whatever boundaries you see in front of you. Just continue to push and be great,” etc. (Continue to be great—super excellent and practical advice!) And also a statement by Eustace denying that tech companies are actively entrenched around their toxic cultures.

Which he clearly though he’d get away with because of no Q&A.

Well, their audience had come prepared. A group called “The Union of Concerned Feminists” handed out “Ally Bingo” cards, so that audience members could tick off all the usual empty phrases you hear when a man is trying to convince you (or VCs or congressional committees) of the sincerity of his commitment to diversity and to supporting women in technology.

About midway through the panel, one woman called out, “Bingo!”

Okay—it turns out that Eustace is somewhat more aware than Nadella, because not too long after the plenary débâcle, he tweeted that he wanted to hold a second, informal, session, where the audience could talk and the execs would listen.

And blow me if Eustace, Irving and Schroepfer didn’t sit down in a room full of women and take notes when individuals shared their experiences (amongst a sea of nodding heads).

It occurs to me that there still wasn’t an actual exchange there, what you could call a discussion, but getting those in power to shut the hell up for a minute and actually listen is a major step forward to getting some clarity about the problem, so you can begin to work on solving it.

I do hope the execs weren’t just doodling on their notepads, and that whatever attention they were paying lasted at least until they got back to the office.

I also hope they took some of the Ally Bingo cards with them and work to ban those condescending, moronic phrases. That would also be a start.