How do I spam thee?

Let me count the ways: starting with a phishing email purporting to be from the US Postal Service.

What was my first clue? Aside from not having sent any packages since December? Or any, ever, that would pass through Des Moines?

Or the fact that, in these United States, we use the term “package”, not “parcel”? The Brits, and their former colonies (like Nigeria), use the latter.

Ditto the use of plural verb with the subject noun “company”. Again, the Brits use plural verbs with nouns that could represent a collective group. (“Her Majesty’s Government are most displeased.”) We use singular ("Congress just sucks.")

Maybe that the USPS is unlikely to have any service involving the concept “expedited”?

Or that any government employee would employ an exclamation point in written or electronic communication?

Perhaps the idea that any American would have shipped a package or parcel s/he’d consider worth paying $14.13 a day in storage fees? (Or, “for each day of keeping of it”)

Especially via the USPS.

They do get a pass on incorrect usage of it’s/its; if Oracle can misuse it like ignoramuses, it’s not necessarily hard evidence against foreign scammers/spammers.